My Mountain Life

It is summer. Hot summer. I love summer the most of the four seasons. Summer is the season of youth. When I was young, yes, still I feel young in my old age, I always waited for summer vacation to swim in the sea and to climb the near mountain to escape the heat. When I stayed at the Miruk Mountain, near my home town, one summer season, I used to go down to the sea to swim, walking from the mountain for one hour every afternoon. The foot of the mountain was the seashore where no one else came except me. So I didn't need a swim suit. I swam naked. I swam far, far away from the seashore into the sea. What a wonderful feeling to swim alone in the sea which is like a lake in a beautiful archipelago. I went far into the sea until exhausted then I floated upon the sea by balancing my body in the water, looking up at the blue sky. After resting, I came back to the seashore with a sun tan and a pensive mood. It was my everyday routine of mountain life. Summer was the season of my youth.

Another time when I needed to convalesce for my health, I went to the Baik Un (means white clouds) Mountain far away from my home town for full one year. I went there in the hot summer. It was hard and sweaty to climb up Baik Un, because it was a very high mountain and it took more than two hours to reach the small Buddhist temple located almost at the top of the mountain where I wanted to stay. All the mountains were forested with many kinds of huge trees which kept us cool all summer. The temple commanded an immaculate and immeasurable view of the landscape surrounding the mountain. I could ee the gleaming sea far away down. There were high hills to the east which I climbed every morning as the sun rose. The view from the east hills was also magnificent. I could see the snaking river Sum Jin far down under the mountain. Before I climbed up the eastern hills, I meditated for an hour to concentrate my spirit. Coming down from the hills, I prepared breakfast for two. One was for the monk, Hal An, and the other was for me. After breakfast I read Buddhist sutras or some other oriental spiritual books written in Chinese to cultivate my spirit. What an awesome feeling to delve deep into my spirit. After lunch I climbed the hills to the west where there were endless trails under the forest to the peaks. Big and small rocks of every shape were covered with green mosses and the crystal clear water of the streams flowed down with a trickling sound that broke the silence of the mountains. Sun beams cut through the trees while I walked. In the trees mountain birds sang endlessly. Green grasses, every kind of plant, and the wild flowers which I never knew the names of carpeted the mountain. There were no need to think at the moment. I just observed everything and read the unwritten letters which I could not translate into the words. Nature itself. Unspeakable astonishing nature! Who is able to put it into words? That was the only “aha” exclamation inscribed into my heart, vividly, not to be forgotten for my whole life.

In the fall, the foliage of the mountains was also inexpressibly dumfounding. Red, yellow, scarlet, and evergreen mixed in the trees, and covered the whole mountains. Seeing such a scenic view from the top of the mountain is a quite different view than that of the seashore to the sea. To see the ocean from the shore does not reveal as much variety compared with the mountains. The view of the mountain is quite different no matter the season. Sometimes in the high mountains there comes snow falling in the late autumn to mix with the still colorful foliage. Imagine white snow covering the brilliant foliage! By the next day all the snow was gone, exposing the full color of autumn again. There were many wild fruits in the mountains. I went to the mountain valleys here and there to pick wild straw berries.

In winter, after all the last leaves of the trees had gone, leaving barren boughs of all the trees, white snow began to fall down covering all the mountains and every valley. You cannot bear to hear the harsh sound of the trees’ crying under the full strength of the winter wind blowing over the mountains. Sometimes you cannot sleep almost all night. That heart piercing bitter sound of the winter gale completely shatters your body and soul. It is the sound of the mountain struggling against the unendurable severe cold. However, when the bitter wind subsided the next morning, I climbed up again to the east hills through the snow trails as the sun rose. What a brilliant world! The branches of the trees wrapped with snow were melting into ice, which appeared like glass coral dazzling with colors of a rainbow in the sunbeams all over the mountains. It was not this world, rather, quite another world. It was ineffable, dumfounding!

In winter, there was nothing to do during the day. It was a time of reading and meditation all day. For one year I would eat rice and vegetables only like a monk. It was the time of living ascetically to cultivate my spirit. Every day I exulted and every moment my soul was ascending. I could understand why all the saints lived alone. I told the monk who was the my only companion at the time that I would not speak for a while. I did not want to lose such an unspeakable moment, even for a while. It had happened at the Baik Un Mountain in that winter.

At last long winter had gone and spring came back. The living buds of green colors appeared on the earth in the warm spring wind. Every flower began blooming in every valley day by day. Streams were murmuring again here and there. Birds were flying and singing in the forest again. Lives were resuming! I came down from the Baik Un Mountain at the next summer after one full year. I cannot forget my mountain life. I yearn now for my old mountain life.

The Burning Twilight of Newport Beach

I go to Newport Beach at the time of sunset almost every day to walk on the sand
beach for exercise and meditation. My heart leaps when I behold on the endless ocean horizon, as William Wordsworth beholds a rainbow in the sky. I walk on the sand with bare feet, my pants rolled up to my thighs. I do not mind the occasional crawling of the waves over my feet and legs. The waves rather make me laugh and bring me joy. I was born at Tong Yung, a little harbor, along the Han Ryu Water Way, one of the most famous sightseeing places in Korea. I spent my childhood playing and swimming in the sea all summer. But the sea was not the ocean. It was like a small lake. So even now we are call the east side of the small port, “East Lake” and the west side of the sea, “West Lake.” The sea has no waves and is always calm, because the sea is surrounded by numerous small, beautiful islands. It is a breathtaking archipelago.

My old home town sea is unforgettable and my feelings of nostalgia are very strong whenever I think of it, but I love Newport Beach even more, because I can see the endless horizon of the Pacific Ocean touching infinity. The sight sends me flying in endless imagination through the boundless sky. I listen to the rolling sound of waves which crash on the vast sandy beach with a regular rhythm. It seems to me the sound of ocean’s breathing and whispering of the secret truth of its awesome and mysterious nature.

Most of all I love to see the twilight of the Pacific from Newport Beach. I could not see the sun rise or set at my home sea because there were high mountains of islands all around of my town. But from Newport Beach at sunset, I can see the sun drop into the Pacific Ocean. The scenes of twilight change each day. The seascapes of twilight change depending on the season, temperature, humidity, wind, and clouds; both thick and thin, high and low. The color of the sky and the sea reflect every color of the sunset. The scenes are even quite different depending upon the state of my mind at the moment. It can never be the same sunset every day. The sky color changes by the moment. If the clouds are too thick, I can not see the twilight at all. If the clouds are too few or too thin, I cannot see the brilliant twilight. There must be a lump of clouds, thick and thin, here and there if I want to see full-colored twilight. The clouds must not only be in the western sky, but some in the far eastern sky also. After the twilight glowing in the west, the thin clouds in the eastern sky also glow with a weak pink and green for brief moments. Sometimes, if I am lucky enough, I can see the golden sun beaming down through the dark clouds and all the western clouds burning with red, pink, and brilliant golden light in the darkening green and blue sky. If I am very lucky, I can see seagulls flying across the backdrop of golden clouds and listen to the sound of the skirting seashore waves at the same moment. I am spellbound.

I love Newport Beach. And I go to Newport Beach almost every day to see such a splendid twilight. I will keep going to see more stunning twilights as long as I live in California. Every time I walk on the beach and behold the twilight, my heart is full and lifted up with the trembling wish that I could also fade away like a sea bird flying in the burning twilight, listening the sound of Newport Beach waves in my heart.
10/12/1997

My every day life

I love to review the dreams I had last night when I awoke in the morning. The world in my dream and the world in the real are always quite different which always baffles me. In a quite mood I muse of my dream until it fades away as my mind awakes in the real world by and by. There are two Is. One is in a dream and one is in the real. Which one is real I? It seems to me always I in my dream would be more real than in the real.

I love to walk to the near park in the morning. What are sweet and fresh air! The aroma from the flowers and trees of every kind of beside streets are delicate and brisk. Big and small birds are flying in the sky. Some birds are walking on the grass to eat something. They do not afraid the people on the street. I love to say "Hi!" to anyone whom I meet in the street. Sometimes the beams of rising sun shine on me with warm touching.

I do not eat break first. I read THE KOREA TIMES and LA TIMES. Through them I can see the situation of my country, the States and the world. It takes almost two hours. Also through them I can get many information which I need for my life to go to the lectures, operas, concerts, museums, theaters and sports. Yes, sport only by TV. After reading papers I do my house chores; cleaning rooms, gardening, and checking mails and emails.

At noon I have a brunch and then I have a nap about for an hour. And then I go to the Newport library. Always I am taking my books and read them in the quite room which has large windows toward the pacific ocean. Most of the time I read science books of cosmic, physics, archeology, geology, anthropology, biology, and life-engineering. I have a keen interesting about the origin of life. Now I am reading of Itzhak Bentov’s "Stalking the Wild Pendulum" and Paul Davis’ "God and the New Physics". My study is the religion through the science. I believe if the religion is the real in the cognitive world it must be studied by the way of the reason and scientific way to understand to everyone. Faith is real but it is hard to understand and to convince.

I believe life has one origin like the universe has its one origin. They say the universe started from the unimaginable tiny space and time, so called, big bang some 15 billion years ago. And the universe has same subtle principles some of them we understand but some of them we cannot understand yet. Every galaxies and stars have composed with same elements with many kinds of atoms like a hydrogen, helium, carbon, uranium…etc. which we discovered till now.
So much every animals and plants have composed with same cells which composed with same elements with only different DNA. Every DNA has a same structure but slightly different ways. And they have a same principle to live and to die.

All living things have a recognition which responses at the stimulus. But recognition belongs not only to the animals but to the plants also. I strongly believe that recognition is not only belongs the living things which we say animals and plants but to every thing we think no living things like a stone, sands, water, rocks, mountains, moon, and stars. Different is the quality and quantity of recognition. Every electromagnetic waves of radio and television or cellular phone has a different length and cycle. But the principle of wave is same. Waves comes not only from the radio station but from everything. Everything has a wave. And everything is wave itself. We can perceive an idea or thinking through waves of our brain nerves. And we can see, sometimes, others idea or thinking by the instinct through the reception organ of the sixth sense, so call it, or inspiration through the waves. That is my understanding and belief of everything in the existence of matter or non matter.

If I love a stone I think it loves me. Love is also some kind of energy with waves. Wave comes from everything. Every material things composed with only waves which is energy. We can remember the famous formula of Einstein "E=mC " which means Energy is Material. And energy or material is the states of waves. We know every material thing composed with atoms which composed with a nucleus and electrons, neutrons etc... They are nothing but energy, another words waves. So far we understand the composition of universe with many kinds of colossal energy. It may be called God if we say so. Who can understand the true and exact conception of God? But who can proof God exactly? Also who can deny God?

May be Christian says God exists in the faith. But what is faith? There are many kinds of faith. Every religion has its own faith. If they call ‘Yahweh’ for God of the Christianity, Islam calls it ‘Allah’, Hindu calls it ‘Brahman’ and Buddhism calls it "Enlightenment" or "Buddha". What is different? It is the only difference of understanding. Problem is the prejudice and stubbornness of the people of every religion which had been brainstormed through their own dogma or doctrine for more than thousands years. Look at the extremist of Islam who dies willingly as the suicide bum terrorists now in the Middle East. Not only to Islam. What a shame history of Christianity.

They killed numerous people as the heresy through the inquisition by the name of God. They killed more than five million women as the witch for the three centuries. They killed midwives for they used the herb anesthesia to alleviate the travail. Because woman must be suffered at the moment of childbirth as a matter of course to save their soul as Paul said in his letter according to the story of Eve’s eating apple first in the Genesis.

At the sunset moment I go to the Newport Beach to work on the beach musing again about my idea looking endless horizon of the pacific ocean and the colorful evening sky. Missing the twilight of the ocean, I return home and eat supper with my wife. And I watch news and some interesting programs of television with my wife for an hour. And at this time we talk all the things happened in the day time. We try to sleep early for next morning. These are my everyday life.

1/28/05

On Waldon Pond

Science without Religion is lame. Religion without Science is blind. Albert Einstein